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by greyassassin24



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Existential Crisis, F/F, M/M, Misery, Sexuality Crisis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-18
Updated: 2016-05-18
Packaged: 2018-06-09 04:48:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6890830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greyassassin24/pseuds/greyassassin24
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Meet Adrianne Hawke, a aging woman living a grueling, body breaking job, sacrificing her health and happiness to protect her family. Sleepwalking through life, she feels worn, beaten down... cheated.</p><p>Then the Blight arrives, and everything changes. She is thrust headfirst into a life of crime, and finds herself liberated, alive. Now, drawn into the underworld, can she provide for her family, and keep herself alive?</p>
            </blockquote>





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_A.N: Hi all, thanks for checking out my story! Just a few notes for ya'll: This story replaces Carver with Male Hawke, but his older sister shall still be the Champion. This story is rated mature, and intended for mature readers. It won't be gratuitous, but will deal with mature topics. Other than that, please enjoy!_

* * *

 

Adrianne Hawke was miserable.

The hot sun beat down, hot, heavy, consuming all thoughts other than pain. Her muscles ached, as if having been drained and left with hollow husks. Down came the rusted scythe, again and again, cutting through the impossible amount of hay that she had to cut and bale within the day. It wasn't much left, she had gotten most of it done after hours of gruelling work, but what remained may as well have filled all of Ferelden.

She brought it down once more, the blade barely nicking the surface and hit a wall within herself. She dropped the scythe, and doubled over, wheezing for breath. She began coughing, chest collapsing in on itself, and fell to her knees, spots beginning to swim before her eyes.

When it died down, and when her vision cleared she realized she had coughed blood onto her hand.

Wiping it away, she shook it off and picked up her tools once more.

* * *

 "Oh Maker's breath." Hawke shook her head, looking down. She didn't have enough coins. Even after all her work, she was poor as dirt.

"Adrianne?" The wide-eyed elven clerk lady behind the counter asked, looking at her. "Is everything okay?"

Hawke looked once more over over what she was buying. A replacement for the lock that had broken, elfroot for whatever sickness Bethany was suffering from, and food enough for four people. She had only earned a half sovereign, and it wasn't enough.

Hawke sighed. "Fuck it." At that, she took away a quarter of the food. It was her responsibility to take care of her family, whatever that cost.

* * *

 "Surprise!" The universal shout as Adrianne opened the door startled her, jumping back and covering her mouth, almost dropping the bag in her hands. There stood what must have been half the village, mother, Bethany and Garrett at the forefront. _What in the world-_

"Happy birthday baby." Leandra smiled, hugging her daughter. "My goodness, seems it was just yesterday we were helping you figure out how to walk." Birthday. It hit Hawke like a wave of freezing cold water splashed over her head. Garrett hugged her too, followed by Bethany, and she felt like she was in a haze but hugged back.

She was thirty. _Thirty_.

"How's it feel to be old?" Garrett joked, patting her on the shoulder. She smiled, but didn't answer. "Hey, I'm just kidding. Happy birthday, sis."

Her heart pounded in her ears as she realized it, but smiled weakly, stepping forward and hearing herself say thanks even though she never felt herself speak. She went and put the bag of groceries on the table, and found a quiet corner to sit.

It was as if no one wanted to talk to her directly, as if she had arrived at a party for someone else. People went milling about, finding their own groups and talking amongst themselves. Several people came over to wish her a happy year to come, which she smiled at and thanked them, but felt cold, dead. She hadn't even realized that this had been today. Was that why she was coughing blood earlier? She had simply gotten too old to keep working the fields, the only job she could find?

"Honey?" Leandra asked, sitting next to Hawke. "Is everything alright? You seem… distracted."

"Yeah." Hawke nodded once, then again. "I'm just… not feeling good, is all. Long day working."

Leandra scoffed. "I do _not_ like how hard they work you over there. You know, darling I've half a mind to..." The words faded away from Hawke's mind as she laid back, fading into background noise. Mother tried, Maker but she did, but Hawke couldn't listen right now.

"Adrianne?" She opened her eyes, looking over. "Honey, do we need to take you to a healer? You really don't look good."

"I… I'm fine, mother, really." She shook her head. "Listen, I… know you went to a lot of trouble for this, and I really do appreciate it, but… if it's alright, I think I need some rest right now."

Leandra met her gaze a good long moment, then nodded. "Of course, darling." She smiled. "I'll tell everyone you felt ill and needed to take a break. They'll understand, I promise." She stood up and kissed her on the forehead. "You go rest, and if you still feel like this tomorrow morning we'll go see the healer, okay?"

"Okay." Hawke smiled, and went upstairs. Even if they had the money for the healer, it would do nothing. The sickness was inside of her, and even the best couldn't heal her.

"Is she okay?" Garrett asked, looking up as Hawke left them behind.

"I don't know."

Locking her room behind her, Hawke threw herself onto the bed and closed her eyes. Pulling down her pants, she caressed her lower lips, to no effect. Moving her fingers inside, she still felt completely dry, no matter how she moved it. Resorting to the clit, her heart broke when nothing happened.

She tried late into the night, until she heard everyone leave, until she heard doors close as they night fell upon them.

Finally, she rolled over and cried herself to sleep.


End file.
